sol·ace | /ˈsäləs/

noun

1. Comfort in grief; alleviation of grief or anxiety.

2. A source of relief or consolation.

Writer’s Block

I found it particularly hard to settle on a topic for this week. I threw several ideas into the ether, but none hit the target. I searched for “bad news in August,” “world news,” “good news,” and “what to look forward to in September”—only to get more blocked.

Then I realized: I was in desperate need of solace. I suspect my readers might be, too.

August is not quite over, and my searches revealed that the month’s news scale tilts heavily toward the dark side. I pulled up a news list on Wikipedia, only to realize the sheer volume of crisis entries was for August 1st alone. The good news list, by contrast, was mostly a few animal stories. This August does not bode well for us humans on a global scale.

Inviting Mara to Tea

It’s funny how switching to a mundane task like loading the dryer with wet towels can spark inspiration. The ordinary isn’t loaded with grief or anxiety. When we are overcome by events beyond our control, it’s easy to slide into despair. Fortunately, a retreat I attended years ago taught me a helpful Buddhist practice.

“There are many stories about the Buddha inviting Mara to tea—Mara being the demon who represented death, destruction, lust, and temptation. Rather than viewing the demon with despair or as an enemy, the Buddha would offer Mara a comfortable seat, welcoming him with tea, conversation, friendliness, and grace. They would part in peace.”

I can tell you it works, especially when navigating chronic health conditions or heavy news cycles. (For a deeper dive, check out this piece from the Opening Heart Mindfulness Community: Sharing Tea with the Buddha).

Rather than falling down the rabbit holes of global tragedy, I chose to focus on the real-world communities that offer me genuine solace.

A Night at Old Major

On Friday night, I joined my daughter and her partner at my favorite watering hole, Old Major Bar, for dinner and karaoke. The place was packed, filled with excellent vocalists earning well-deserved applause. All demons had been checked at the locked door, unable to be buzzed in.

I felt safe enough in that shared joy to request “Love Shack” by the B-52s. My daughter and I grabbed one mic, a fellow patron grabbed another, and soon the entire bar was singing along.

The Flea Market

On Sunday, I joined fellow volunteers to prep for our annual church flea market. The money raised goes directly to Community Outreach grants. Sorting through donations offers a quiet window into the lives of our neighbors. Some items come from the estates of those who recently passed—a gentle, physical reminder of the old adage: You can’t take it with you.

Finding Meaning in the Dark

When dealing with grief or heavy themes, there are two historical authors I always turn to: Viktor Frankl and Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn.

As a novelist writing historical fiction set in Lithuania and Baltimore, I often dig deep into generational tragedy. These writers remind me how the human spirit survives it:

• Viktor Frankl: Born in Vienna in 1905, Frankl endured daily persecution before surviving the concentration camps. In Man’s Search for Meaning, he posited that individuals endure hardship by discovering a core purpose.

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

• Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn: Arrested during WWII for criticizing Stalin in private letters, Solzhenitsyn survived prison camps, exile, and cancer before winning the 1970 Nobel Prize in Literature. One of my favorite takeaways from his work:

“There’s more than one way of working. If it’s for human beings—make sure and do it properly. If it’s for the big man—just make it look good.”

Heavy reading isn’t for everyone, of course. When I need pure escapism, Netflix serves as my go-to medium for lighter fare.

10 Small Ways to Find Solace

To leave us with a practical anchor when things feel overwhelming, here is a list adapted from creator Chase Amie on finding daily comfort:

1. Emotionally check in with friends.

2. Make the effort to hold virtual hangouts.

3. Practice a whole lot of self-care.

4. Remind yourself that staying home is doing something.

5. Support local businesses where you can.

6. Donate if you have the means.

7. Tackle a small project at home.

8. Take on a fun new challenge.

9. Take intentional news breaks.

10. Celebrate the little things.

I’m currently doing almost all of these except #8—my plate is plenty full! A year ago, my “new challenge” was launching a weekly Substack, which remains a rewarding work in progress.

Over to You

• How do you find solace when the world feels too heavy?

• Feel free to copy and paste your favorites from the list above in the comments, or share your own go-to practice!

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🎵 Listen/Watch: "Love Shack" by The B-52's on YouTube

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Sirius

Traditionally, the dog days of summer ran from July 3 to August 11 each year. The expectation was that the rest of August would start to cool down. As the ancient Greeks and Romans noted, during midsummer, Sirius rose and set right alongside the Sun. Because Sirius is so bright, they incorrectly believed the star added its own scorching heat to the Sun, causing droughts, sudden storms, fever, and bad luck. - Wikipedia

I don’t think the ancient Romans were incorrect this year, and the storms have not yet ended. I have never experienced a summer like this—it has truly been the summer from hell. Summers are getting worse, and I don’t think I’m barking up the wrong tree.

Summers Are Getting Hotter

Driven by human-caused climate change and a strong El Niño, several regions—including parts of the U.S. and Europe—are tracking their hottest summers ever recorded. Experts note that 2026 remains on track to potentially be the world’s hottest year ever recorded.

Some of us are feeling sick as a dog, and for good reason. According to Adam Foster (aka the Fibro Guy):

“People with fibromyalgia often experience heat intolerance and temperature dysregulation because their central nervous systems process temperature and pain signals abnormally. This makes them more vulnerable to heat exhaustion, dehydration, and worsened flare-ups of widespread pain and fatigue during hot weather.”

That would be me. I am one of the 2% to 4% of the global and U.S. population living with this highly misunderstood condition.

Back to School Is Around the Corner

I can remember being lethargic in August, right after our annual summer vacation to Ocean City had passed and the return to school was approaching. Getting fitted for a new wool school uniform was especially dreadful. My mom would complain about the price and the fit. I still remember the salesperson saying, “Madam, your daughter does not fit our uniforms.” Consequently, my high school gave my mother permission to make mine by hand—resulting in a uniform that did not match the store-bought ones, and a prime topic for a much later therapy session.

National news this past week has highlighted the return to school as a major “kitchen table” issue.

“With other costs, like gas, going up this year, it’s no surprise parents are planning to curb their back-to-school spending,” says Sara Rathner, a NerdWallet credit cards expert. “But a lot of expenses feel out of their control. This can make it tough to stick to a budget.”

Even after working like dogs, paychecks are not going as far. The cost of fuel made vacations hard to afford, especially for families—2026 has become a dog-eat-dog world in a zero-sum game. Driven by high costs, many drinkers are shifting their habits to stay in and consume alcohol at home rather than going out to bars or restaurants. At least it allows them to afford a morning-after hair of the dog remedy.

Behind the Theme

By now, you may have noticed a recurring theme in this post. It’s because I have gone to the dogs this week. My poor little 12-pound foster had a rough reaction to his dental cleaning and extractions last Wednesday. They had to keep him under observation until he stabilized. I finally brought him home with seven different prescriptions. Little medical dogs are my foster specialty.

While he was at the SPCA shelter, I had a few extra days with his girlfriend, a 78-pound Sheepdog. It was simply a case of puppy love between two old dogs who have learned new tricks. She is back home with her owners now, but I can tell he still dreams about her.

(Try counting how many dog idioms are packed into this post—it was my way of lightening the mood after so much heat!)

From Personal to Politics (Without Getting Political)

Did you know that “dogs that won’t hunt” was a favorite phrase of President Bill Clinton? Try using it in a sentence this week and impress your friends. Can you think of anyone in the news lately who should be sent to the doghouse to sleep?

Has our country hit a rough patch this year and gone to the dogs? In keeping with last week’s discussion on inter-generational group dynamics, the answer to that question would certainly spark some lively debates. Two of my fellow Substack friends, Marisol Muñoz-Kiehne and Susan J. Tweit, also wrote recently about the use of words and how language shifts across generations.

Is the tail wagging the dog? This is one of my personal favorite idioms. Merriam-Webster defines the phrase as being used to describe a situation in which an important or powerful person or organization is being controlled by someone or something much less powerful.

The phrase originated in 1800s American politics to describe populist forces controlling the levers of power in government. I think we can all agree the tail is wagging the dog right now, even if we don’t agree on the breed of the dog. Opposing sides might claim a politician is meaner than a junkyard dog, but then again, who wants a lap dog running for office?

Today’s political campaigns can feel like a total dog and pony show—some carry negative connotations, while others are small or silly efforts dressing themselves up as something ostentatious for nefarious purposes.

Take the UK elections last week, for instance: Count Binface and Baron Von Thunderclap ended up tied in votes, while Howling “Laud” Hope swept past Nick The Incredible Flying Brick in the Clacton by-election.

I will end with the age-old advice that it’s often best to let sleeping dogs lie. After all, when they aren’t causing problems, antagonizing them usually does more harm than good. Be careful what you wish for.

Let me know in the comments how many idioms you counted, and if this brought a brief respite from the heat!

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When my husband took it back then, he came home and told me there were women in his course who understood him better than I ever could. A few years later, after safety guidelines were added, I took the same course. We were warned that our “T-groups” were intensely emotional, boundary-pushing experiences—not real life. The core premise was simple yet volatile: using raw, real-time peer feedback leads either to breakthrough self-awareness or severe emotional distress.

Participants openly shared brutal, unfiltered impressions of each other’s personalities and habits. I vividly remember one woman being confronted for wearing the exact same clothes to every single class. I can’t recall her exact words, but her response was blistering:

“My house burned down, you stupid [fill in the blank]!”

I completed the class in December 1976 and was divorced by March 1977.

From the T-Group to the Therapy Room

I went on to complete another graduate degree to become a psychotherapist. (I had originally planned to become a Clinical Psychologist, but that plan got derailed.) I built a solid track record as a therapist.

I still remember a session with a client who felt completely powerless when trying to stand up for herself. I told her: “When someone accuses you of being defensive, tell them: ‘You’re damned right I am.’”

I explained to her what a total lack of defensiveness actually means. Everyone has the right to protect themselves from perceived threats, attacks, or unfair judgment. Defensiveness only becomes counterproductive when it is an automatic reflex rather than a conscious choice—because we still need to own up to our actual mistakes.

From the Therapy Room to the Classroom

In 1981, I started teaching as an adjunct professor. One of my favorite courses to teach was Men and Women in Management.

At the time, the word “girl” was a loaded term and considered deeply politically incorrect. There were “Men’s” and “Ladies” rooms everywhere. Wedding announcements proclaimed the happy couple “Man and Wife.” Some of my male peers even felt the word “woman” sounded crass.

I still get offended when adult women are called “girls” today, especially in the workplace. It is a generational sore spot after all the work my peers and I did to correct that power imbalance.

Everyday Speech vs. Social Shifts (1970’s)

• Casual References: People routinely called adult female office workers, waitresses, or friends “girls” regardless of their age.

• Professional Imbalances: Bosses and coworkers consistently used “the girls” to refer to female staff, treating them with far less authority than male colleagues.

• Feminist Pushback: The women’s liberation movement of the 1970’s aggressively challenged this habit, arguing that infantilizing women kept them in a secondary status.

• Legal Progress: Milestones like the Equal Credit Opportunity Act of 1974 helped move society toward recognizing women as independent adults rather than dependents.

Before that pushback, however, many women deferred to men and loved being called “girls.” My dad and I talked about this often. He was a handsome man who worked as a buyer for an upscale department store. The “sales girls”—many of his age or older—expected him to compliment their appearance. He told me they thought he was angry with them if he didn’t. It was simply the accepted social norm of that generation.

I still bristle when I hear adult women called “girls.” Whenever one of my therapy client’s male friends mentioned a “girl” he was dating, she would dryly ask: “Who is this prepubescent wonder?”

Forgive Us Our Foibles

My horoscope on August 7 read: Own up to foibles. Not only will it encourage others to cop to theirs, but it also introduces much-needed bonhomie.

Curious, I asked my AI assistant what this meant in plain English:

“Admitting your minor quirks and flaws creates a warmer, more open atmosphere for everyone. It is a call to drop the pretense of perfection because self-awareness and humble honesty build trust and ease in relationships much faster than trying to look blameless.”

I have plenty of foibles, and I’ve made my share of conversational and written PC errors over the years.

Back in February, an Episcopal Minister gave a presentation and introduced our group to the term “recovering racist”—a self-applied label used by individuals who recognize that they have internalized systemic biases or unearned privileges, and are actively working to unlearn those attitudes.

Baltimore is often cited as the birthplace of American redlining. I was 18 years old during the Baltimore riots of April 1968, coming of age under strict segregation laws. So I raise my eyebrows when peers from my grade school days claim they were never racist. That is the exact difference between performing “political correctness” and honestly admitting to a foible.

Navigating Today’s Intergenerational Landmines

This brings us to the present day. It is difficult enough to be labeled a “Boomer” and scapegoated for grandfathering in old habits.

• “Back in my day, there was respect for elders!”

• “Nobody wants to work anymore!”

• “Why don’t you just call them on the phone instead of texting?”

(Though personally, I actually prefer asynchronous communication and scheduled phone calls!)

Since I seem to be the one stepping on conversational landmines lately, I put some effort into learning how to avoid them. I turned to my AI friend once again to map out today’s landscape:

“Talking across different age groups can feel risky when hot-button topics trigger quick judgment. In 2026, common conversational ‘landmines’ between generations often involve clashing views on work ethic, economic realities, technology, and social values.”

Top Generational Conversational Triggers

1. Workplace & Ambition: Debating “quiet quitting,” remote work flexibility versus physical office presence, and company loyalty.

2. Economy & Housing: Comparing how hard it was to buy a home “back then” against today’s housing shortages and cost-of-living realities.

3. Technology & AI: Weighing the value of artificial intelligence and screen time against traditional human skills and face-to-face focus.

4. Social Norms & Language: Navigating changing terminology and identity without older generations feeling policed or younger generations feeling invalidated.

5. Global & Climate Anxiety: Discussing future outlooks where younger generations express systemic doom while older generations advise patience based on historical progress.

Who Do We Want to Become?

I am not afraid of adapting to an ever-changing world. I actively seek out the company of younger people because I want to learn what we share in common.

To repeat what I shared recently: On July 28, Mary Trump delivered a speech where she posed three crucial questions:

“Who are we now? Is this who we want to be? If it is not, then who do we want to become, and how do we get there?”

When I asked AI for practical tips on safe intergenerational dialogue, it suggested:

• Listen to understand: Ask relative questions about why they feel a certain way instead of assuming they want to lecture or dismiss you.

• Avoid sweeping labels: Resist blaming an entire generation for systemic issues or individual actions.

• Validate feelings first: Acknowledge that life experiences and economic baselines genuinely differed across decades before debating solutions.

These tips immediately reminded me of that 1970’s Interpersonal Group Dynamics course. The underlying human principles haven’t changed at all—it’s just the vocabulary that evolves.

Forgive Us Our Trespasses

Making mistakes is an inevitable part of learning. Most people will occasionally say things that hurt someone else’s feelings. But mature individuals are the ones who apologize, learn, and adjust.

Lately, I’ve liked walking my foster dogs on the campus of a Senior Apartment complex next to my development. I prefer it for two simple reasons:

1. The sidewalks are smoothly maintained, unlike the tripping hazards in my own neighborhood.

2. Resident dogs aren’t permitted there, so I don’t have to worry about reactive dog encounters.

Then, just the other day, I noticed a new sign posted at the entrance: NO TRESPASSING. VIOLATORS WILL BE PROSECUTED.

It seems it’s almost as hard to navigate local sidewalks these days as it is to navigate modern conversations.

Sigh.

What conversational “landmines” have you accidentally stepped on across generations recently? Can you “cop” to your foibles? I’d love to hear your stories in the comments below!

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definition source: Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary

An Unfortunate Turn of Events

Since my last post, the world has experienced a relentless succession of headlines: earthquakes, heat domes, floods, fires, shootings, tornadoes, and wildfire smoke.

• As of July 31, 2026, a total of 272 people have been killed and 1,195 wounded in 280 mass shootings across America.

• At least 70 people died from extreme July 2026 heat domes across the United States, though official public health counts will take months to verify.

• Meanwhile, although there have been at least 6,707 laboratory-confirmed cases of cyclosporiasis since July, no deaths in America have been linked to it so far.

Raise your hand if you haven’t kept up with all of these facts. It’s okay if you missed some or all of it. I predict that in about ten years, people will look back and discuss the Summer of 2026. Let’s hope future summers produce more nostalgia than despair.

Primary Election Ramp-Up & The “Rotten Pot”

On June 22, a Fox News opinion piece discussed how John Adams believed free nations and republics are rarely undone solely by external military threats. Instead, he argued, they rot from the inside due to moral decay, loss of civic virtue, and internal polarization. Adams maintained that a society relying on liberty requires a virtuous and disciplined populace; without restraint, excess and factionalism eventually destroy self-government.

Current headlines suggest our collective “rotten pot” is being stirred, and it certainly doesn’t resemble a floral bouquet. Doom and gloom are predicted regardless of who wins in November. Everything will be “their fault” once the votes are counted—leaving us to either catch our breath or choose to remain oblivious.

How We Consume the News

Many of us remember our parents opening a physical newspaper, tuning in to the radio, and planning dinner around the scheduled nightly broadcast. They listened to Walter Cronkite—CBS Evening News anchor from 1962 to 1981, often called “the most trusted man in America.”

Today, while some friends remain tethered to cable news, many in the 20–40 age bracket say they avoid the news entirely to focus on work without constant distraction.

The 2026 Digital News Report by Jim Egan (Reuters Institute) confirms this shift:

“Our 2026 report finds news audiences around the world reacting with growing unease to successive episodes of political, economic, and technological turbulence… The data point to greater volatility, reflecting a heightened sense of uncertainty. We see anxiety, disengagement, and cynicism, but also openness to new sources and formats.”

I strongly suggest you read the summary or full Digital News report .

Flooding the Zone

A recent Substack post I read mentioned the strategy of “flooding the zone with s--t.” Seeking a deeper perspective, I came across an insightful guest post by Zsolt Kapelner (University of Oslo) on Justice Everywhere:

“Flooding the zone as a political strategy aimed at decapacitating public deliberation... is not simply a dirty tactic, but an inherently antidemocratic one. What threatens democracy today is not only fake news, disinformation, and polarization. It is also the destruction of our capacity for collective attention.”

In her keynote speech at the Congressional Reason Reception on July 28, Mary Trump asked:

“Who are we now? Is this who we want to be? If it is not, then who do we want to become, and how do we get there?”

These are essential questions—for us as individuals and for our democracy.

Lessons from Lithuania and Ukraine

Are we going to “rot from the inside”? My preference remains reconciliation—rebuilding trust and safety across groups. We do that by seeking information from varied sources rather than drowning in the flood. Let’s put out the fires between factions and take care of our fragile island home.

Are we going to be undone by external military threats, or will our own actions become our undoing?

• The Middle East: Armageddon was only supposed to last four weeks; we have now passed five months with 18 U.S. service members lost. As of five days ago, only 1 in 3 Americans support the ongoing war in Iran.

• Ukraine & Imperial History: Many Americans wonder why we should support Ukraine. In my book, Ona’s Tears, I wrote from my fictional great-grandmother’s point of view about Lithuanians living under Russian imperialism, where speaking Russian was enforced as part of forced assimilation—a form of cultural genocide.

There are some of us who wonder if we are on the verge of World War III which Ukraine may already be winning for an oblivious West.

“Only one country fully understood what was at stake on a global basis: That was Ukraine, of course. By merely resisting and refusing to capitulate to Putin, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky and his generals were holding back a tide of global setbacks for the West….It seemed Putin and Xi’s visions of a new multi-polar order were openly clashing with traditional Western-style liberal democracy that had largely ensured global peace since the end of World War II in 1945. And the bad guys were winning.”

Lithuania and Ukraine share this history of resisting totalitarianism. During a recent European Union Defense Night in Washington, D.C., EU Defence Chief Andrius Kubilius (from Lithuania) called for stronger European security, declaring “We Need NATO 3.0” as Russia remains a critical long-term threat.

Kubilius closed with typical Lithuanian humor, recalling how descendants of Europeans built America—one was Charles Dennis Buchinsky born in Ehrenfeld, Pennsylvania, whose Lithuanian parents lived in extreme poverty speaking only Lithuanian and Russian. When Charles was young, his coal miner father died and he too worked the mines. Later he served as a WWII Air Force veteran before building his life in the U.S. as actor Charles Bronson.

Kubilius reminded us that Lithuania and America share values of unity in diversity, bound by the motto E pluribus unum. We share the duty of resisting totalitarianism and deterring aggression. Who can argue with that?

If you want to hear more from Andrius Kubilius on European defence and security strategy, you can watch the ‘We Need NATO 3.0’: EU Defence Chief Andrius Kubilius Speech. This video provides direct context on the “NATO 3.0” proposals mentioned in my post regarding transatlantic security and Ukraine.

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Is the news making your head spin? What do you do to calm your mind? I garden, work on jigsaw puzzles, foster dogs, plan getaways to be with friends and family, among other things. As always, thank you for reading.

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Design for the Great Seal of the United States, 1782 (obverse)

Constitutional law is a mandatory class taught during every law student’s first or second year, and it is heavily tested on the bar exam.

To be completely honest, I would have failed Constitutional Law.

My eyes glazed over when my kids tried to teach me to play Catan. The objective is simple enough: reach 10 victory points by building roads, settlements, and cities through rolling dice, trading, and building. But all I remember is shouting, “I don’t want your sheep!”

Now, since I love trains, learning Ticket to Ride was a piece of cake. And as it turns out, board games and national governance aren’t all that different:

“Rules are an integral part of games, and they serve a variety of purposes. One of the main purposes of rules is to establish a level playing field for all players. By defining the parameters of the game, rules help to ensure that everyone is playing by the same set of rules and that no one has an unfair advantage.” — Michael Filimowicz

The Constitution is simply the rule book for governing in America.

CORE CONSTITUTIONAL TOPICS:
• Federalism: The balance of power between the federal government and individual states.
• Separation of Powers: Division of authority among legislative, executive, and judicial branches.
• Individual Rights: Protections under the Due Process and Equal Protection clauses.
• Judicial Review: The power of courts to check government actions.

As the National Archives reminds us, the Constitution contains a preamble and seven articles establishing how the government operates and creating a system of checks and balances so no single branch becomes dominant. Executive and judicial officers all take an oath or affirmation to support this rule book.

The Teams Playing the Game

Games can be played as individuals or in teams. If politics in America is a game, we certainly have no shortage of team names.

Here are America’s Favorite Team Names, in alphabetical order:

• Anti-Masonic

• Communist

• Constitutionalist

• Democrat

• Democratic-Republican

• Fascist

• Free Soil

• Green

• Know Nothing

• Libertarian

• Populist / Progressive

• Republican

• Socialist

• Whig

Following James Madison’s advice, Americans today can refuse to be misled into describing the U.S. in a single, inadequate term or team.

Instead, we might prize two historic commitments at once: to a republic that insists on the people’s right to be represented rather than ruled, and to a democracy that ensures ordinary people might collectively make it so.

A Proposal for the White House Lawn

“In a world where there are so many forces trying to tear us apart, sport has the power to unite. Watching fans from around the world embrace America, and Americans embrace different cultures, has been inspiring.” — Matthew Robinson, Professor of Sport Management

So, I have an idea.

America’s favorite political teams should hold a Soccer Match.

Each team would contribute an entry fee. The White House Lawn could be turned into a full soccer pitch. And all proceeds would be applied directly toward balancing the federal budget.

You would not be the first person to call me crazy, but I hope you at least chuckled at my plan.

As Benjamin Franklin famously noted, “In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.” But perhaps we can add political absurdities to that list.

From the Sublime to the Ridiculous

250 years ago, Thomas Paine published a modest pamphlet called Common Sense, galvanizing colonists to seek independence. He enlisted in the Continental Army in 1776, served as an aide to General Nathanael Greene, and authored The American Crisis essays—opening with the immortal words, “These are the times that try men’s souls.” His writings provided the philosophical bedrock for the Declaration of Independence.

Decades later, in 1994, attorney Philip K. Howard published The Death of Common Sense: How Law is Suffocating America, analyzing the excesses and deficiencies of modern regulatory law and bureaucracy.

It brings to mind a concept popularized by both Napoleon Bonaparte and Thomas Paine: “From the sublime to the ridiculous.” It implies that a very noble or serious thing is often only a tiny step away from a silly or funny one.

Which brings me to my final sharing—Eleanor Roosevelt’s Nightly Prayer:

“...forbid us to be satisfied with what we make of life.

Draw us from base content, and set our eyes on far-off goals. Keep us at tasks too hard for us that we may be driven to thee for strength. Deliver us from fretfulness and self-pitying; make us sure of the good we cannot see and the hidden good in the world.

Open our eyes to simple beauty all around us and our hearts to the loveliness men hide because we do not try to understand them. Save us from ourselves and show us a vision of a world made new. May the spirit of peace and illumination so enlighten our minds that all life shall glow with new meaning and new purpose...”

Whether a prayer like this is sublime or ridiculous depends entirely on one’s perspective. Believers view it as a sublime connection with the divine, while critics might see it as a futile exercise.

In a world governed by complex rules, competing teams, and endless games, perhaps our best move is simply choosing to look for the hidden good in one another.

Tell me what you think in the comment section. It can be sublime or ridiculous. Lets play a game without rules and lighten up.

The foundational texts of youth often shape our lifelong views of accountability.. Source: normallens / Getty Images

Many of us Baby Boomers attended Catholic school. In my case, I honestly thought every single city had its own custom catechism. I still own a copy of my Baltimore Catechism. I can recite the Apostles’ Creed entirely from memory today, yet I sometimes struggle to recall the finer points of the three branches of government—a consequence of a fleeting, long-ago lesson on civics.

Growing up, I also assumed there were only two true religions: Catholic and Public. The kids in my neighborhood went to one or the other, and we felt we knew exactly who was eligible to go to heaven and who was fast-tracked for the alternative.

The nuns taught us about the state of our souls by drawing on the chalkboard. The human soul, according to their illustrations, had the distinct shape of a russet potato.

We learned there were two types of sins: venial and mortal.

• Venial Sins: These were casually shaded onto the potato soul using the flat side of a piece of chalk.

• Mortal Sins: These were violently pounded into the slate with the sharp tip of the chalk, leaving permanent, audible dents on the board.

If we confessed, the venial smudges were easily wiped away. But those sharp, deep mortal sins? They stayed. We were left staring at a baked potato with serious eyes, carrying permanent marks.

A mortal sin had to meet three strict conditions simultaneously: grave matter, full knowledge, and deliberate consent. If all three intersected, it severed your relationship with God entirely, resulting in eternal damnation. The terrifying thought of spending eternity in hell taught us a secular lesson, too: it forced us to recognize, and take absolute responsibility for, deeply destructive behavior. Sometimes, this moral boundary coincided with breaking human law.

What Were the “Publics” Learning?

So, what were the kids at the public schools being taught while we were focused on the Baltimore Catechism? Without spending a third of their day on religious doctrine, they adhered to a remarkably similar structural curriculum.

Schools in the 1950’s maintained a strict curriculum and rigid teaching methods, leaving little room for deviation. The focus remained squarely on traditional subjects like math, science, and literature, heavily driven by lectures and rote memorization.

Civics was once a foundational pillar of that traditional curriculum. However, it experienced a steep decline starting in the 1960’s. Decades later, it was further marginalized by the 2001 No Child Left Behind Act, which aggressively shifted public school focus and funding toward standardized testing in reading and math.

Today, education remains entirely decentralized. There are no mandatory federal standards for civics education. State requirements vary wildly; roughly 39 states require at least one basic course in government or civics, while the rest rely on loosely integrating it into broader U.S. History classes.

The Ultimate Constitutional Crisis

A proper civics education is supposed to teach us a fundamental truth: the U.S. federal government is divided into three co-equal branches to ensure a strict separation of powers.

• Legislative Branch: Makes the laws (Congress, consisting of the Senate and the House of Representatives).

• Executive Branch: Enforces the laws (Led by the President, the Vice President, and the Cabinet).

• Judicial Branch: Interprets the laws (The Supreme Court and lower federal courts).

But what happens when one branch simply ignores the checks and balances enshrined in our Constitution? Specifically, if the judiciary issues a definitive ruling and the executive branch flatly refuses to obey it, what levers are left to pull? This is exactly what the Trump Administration does.

Writing in the Federalist Papers, Alexander Hamilton described the judiciary as the weakest of the three departments of power:

“The judiciary... may truly be said to have neither FORCE nor WILL, but merely judgment; and must ultimately depend upon the aid of the executive arm even for the efficacy of its judgments.”

When the executive branch chooses to ignore the judiciary, it triggers an immediate constitutional crisis. Courts have no standing army, no police force, and no enforcement power of their own. They rely entirely on the integrity of executive agencies—like the U.S. Marshals or the Department of Justice—to back up their legal judgments.

When that integrity vanishes, the system fractures.

The Modern “Mortal Sins” of Society

There is a gnawing, pervasive feeling across America and the West that a self-serving elite has completely corrupted the rules of society to favor themselves. Landmark events, like the partial unsealing of the Epstein files, have pulled back the curtain on the hidden networks the powerful use to advance their own interests and evade legal accountability.

Pundits spend an immense amount of energy pitting political parties against each other. Yet, the data shows that the margins are overwhelming among Democrats, Republicans, and Independents alike when it comes to a foundational truth: corruption is the heart of political evil.

It shouldn’t be a partisan competition. Our collective democracy is tilting. Citizens United and subsequent judicial rulings over the last two decades have heavily weighted the scales in favor of mega-donors over everyday voters.

Americans broadly agree that systemic corruption has the power to drive our democracy off a cliff, and we know that voting is our primary mechanism to effect change. Yet, a telling indicator of our national morale is that only 39% of us currently say voting in elections is “very effective” at changing the country for the better. Activities like protesting, attending rallies, or volunteering for campaigns are viewed as even less impactful.

Is Freedom a Right, or a Responsibility?

“We the People” is a phrase of mutual dependence. It means my individual freedom is inherently tied to your freedom. If liberty for one group is systematically restricted or removed, it jeopardizes the entire democratic framework we all rely on. Living in a free society means we are charged with actively protecting freedom for one another through our shared civic responsibilities.

The sheer breadth of modern public unhappiness suggests a deep, underlying moral critique. Even now, amid wrenching technological change and evaporating institutional standards, regular people remain focused on a core desire for personal and leadership responsibility.

We are missing a collective sense of consequences. We are missing the chalkboard.

I want to close with a thought from my Canadian Substack colleague, Trish Findlay, who loves to dig into the definitions of interesting, theatrical words like Scaramouche—the stock comedic character of a roguish, unscrupulous clown. She summarized our current geopolitical theater perfectly:

“One cannot help but draw the conclusion that the most evident Scaramouche is making the world dance the fandango while he carries the nuclear codes, and no one is laughing.”

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Poll results are by percentage of votes and do not disclose the identity of voters. You are also encouraged to use the comment sections and engage in a conversation. I promise eternal damnation is not at risk.

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The Current Atmosphere: A World on Edge

While not as memorable or studied as presidential campaigns, midterm elections frequently stand as pivotal pivot points in U.S. history. Smithsonian Magazine famously curated a list of the top historic midterms. To see the stark relevance of what is at stake for our upcoming November 2026 elections, we only have to look at how closely today’s headlines echo our past.

Here are four historical flashpoints where everything was on the line:

• 1826 — The Era of “Hard Feelings”: The founding feud over limited versus less-limited government seemed to fade as the Federalist Party collapsed and the Democratic-Republican Party splintered, ushering in a completely new era of partisanship.

• 1858 — A House Divided: Facing a severe recession and a nation bitterly fractured over slavery, many Southerners openly threatened to secede if a Republican were ever elected president. Ultimately, they did.

• 1874 — Deconstruction: Dogged by White House scandals, a severe financial panic, and disputed electoral votes, this cycle cast deep doubt on the subsequent 1876 presidential election. Federal troops eventually left the South, effectively ending Reconstruction.

• 1994 — The Republican Revolution: Following stumbling efforts to overhaul healthcare and intense debates over military bans, Washington experienced a massive surge in partisan polarization, setting the stage for the dramatic decade to follow.

It seems today’s headlines are rarely new; they are echoes.

The Weight of the Present

There is a reason so many of us are feeling heavy today. Whether it’s personal or global, the intensity of our current climate is hard to escape. I know people who have completely stopped listening to the news—choosing total disconnect just to avoid that sudden, deep drop in their stomach whenever our political environment gets pushed to its limits.

Nevertheless, choosing to help make the world a better place is the most positive combatant against despair. While “not my problem” might work in minor situations, we have a collective responsibility to think about America’s future for the generations following us. Paying attention to what is fractured—and actively considering how to fix it—says something deeply positive about who we are.

We possess the ultimate power to empower others. Between now and October, I plan to launch a “Get Out the Vote” postcard campaign through the Outreach Committee at my church. I will keep you all posted on our steps and progress right here.

But as the flight attendants always remind us: we must put on our own oxygen mask first. We do that by:

1. Making intentional time for self-care.

2. Making deliberate space for gratitude.

3. Acknowledging negative emotions without dwelling in them.

The Broken Toe Analogy: Think of it this way—if you have a broken toe, you have to care for it until it heals. You can be incredibly grateful that you don’t need a rigid splint, or that you’re still able to slip your shoes on. But if someone accidentally steps on that foot? You are fully entitled to a negative reaction, and you’re allowed to sputter a few choice words until the sharp pain subsides.

What the World Thinks of Us

Every morning, I listen to TVP World (Poland’s English-language breaking news) because I want to know exactly what the rest of the world has to say about America. It’s written in the very same vein as the classic question, “Do these pants make me look fat?” (A phrase I can thank my mother for introducing to my vocabulary).

Lately, I’ve been tracking the global reaction to the international stage. Following the recent NATO Summit on July 7, public and media commentary surrounding Donald Trump’s unfiltered public declarations has left many international partners adopting a careful, placating stance to manage sudden policy shifts.

To see how America itself feels about our direction, I pulled up the latest job approval data from July 10, 2026. “Deportment” isn’t a graded category like it was in my elementary school report cards, but the raw numbers speak volumes:

Polling Aggregator / SourceApproval Rating

Here’s latest data on July 10, 2026:

• Ballotpedia has Trump with a 40% approval rating.

• RealClearPolitics has Trump with a 40.4% approval rating.

• Quinnipiac University has Trump with a 38% approval rating.

• The Economist/YouGov has Trump with a 37% approval rating.

• ABC News/Washington Post/Ipsos has Trump with a 37% approval rating.

• CNN has Trump with a 37% approval rating.

In the strict metrics of grading, anything below a 65% is an “F.” Fortunately for any sitting leader, the term is a long road, leaving time to pull those averages up. But why does this lack of stability matter right now? Because we run the risk of slipping into a fundamentally dysfunctional country.

As political analyst Marvin Kalb poignantly wrote - October 28, 2013

“The U.S. remains the indispensable nation, even though a large number of its senior officials appear to be increasingly unhappy about its apparent inability to govern in an effective manner, both at home and abroad. Only one person can right the ship of state, can lead it into calmer waters, and he is the President of the United States.”

The Current Landscape: A Nation Navigating Transition

If we look at a snapshot of where America stands right now, the country is navigating a complex web of rising domestic energy costs, tense international friction points, and massive structural shifts in Washington. Reuters

• Geopolitical Ripples: Renewed military friction between the U.S. and regional actors in the Middle East has temporarily disrupted global oil lines, leading to a noticeable spike in U.S. gasoline prices. While federal officials stress that deep domestic production shields us from total foreign reliance, the pocketbook impact remains real for everyday citizens. Al Jazeera

• Washington in Transition: The capital is experiencing a profound period of political transition following the sudden, unexpected passing of key Trump ally Senator Lindsey Graham. At the same time, leadership questions persist as Senator Mitch McConnell remains hospitalized, creating an unprecedented wave of speculation over the future balance of congressional power.

  MPR News

Your Guide to November: The 2026 Party Platforms

To empower others to vote effectively, we have to understand the literal rules of engagement. As a baseline reminder of our constitutional foundation:

“The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex. Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.” — The 19th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution

With all 435 seats in the House of Representatives and 33 regular seats in the Senate on the ballot this November 3, 2026, here is where the primary platforms stand:

The Republican Focus

The conservative platform focuses heavily on border enforcement, structural tax policies, and public safety initiatives to retain and expand congressional majorities:

• Border Security: Implementing strict immigration enforcement and enhanced measures to halt unlawful entries.

• Economy & Taxes: Advancing free-enterprise initiatives and scaling back federal regulatory rules on business operations.

• Crime & Safety: Offering robust support to local law enforcement alongside tougher criminal penalties.

• Education: Expanding state-level school choice systems and emphasizing parental rights.

The Democratic Focus

The progressive platform centers on lowering immediate consumer costs, codifying protections for personal liberties, and expanding housing access:

• Cost of Living: Targeting corporate price-gouging on daily necessities like groceries and fuel.

• Affordability Programs: Restoring internet broadband subsidy discounts and expanding nutrition support initiatives like SNAP.

• Housing & Rights: Enacting rent-burden relief packages, expanding housing supply, codifying federal reproductive freedoms, and safeguarding voter access against gerrymandering.

• Technology & Climate: Advancing green energy jobs while introducing strict federal oversight on artificial intelligence and consumer data privacy.

The Independent Perspective

For those who find themselves outside the rigid binary, independent perspectives generally unite around foundational structural reform rather than strict partisan ideology:

• Pragmatism Over Base-Pleasing: Prioritizing practical policy outcomes on infrastructure and healthcare over messaging wins.

• Direct Accountability: Demanding that officials answer to local constituents rather than major donors or national party mechanisms.

• Systemic Rules Reform: Restructuring open primaries and redistricting laws so that actual voters hold the true balance of power.

These aren’t inherently left-wing or right-wing values. They are common-sense, structural goals that a quiet majority of Americans share.

I am going to end this week’s post with a community poll. Keep an eye out just below this text to cast your vote on which of these three Independent values resonates most with you!

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Baltimore Immigration Museum

I am not a formal student of history, but I know this much: America was built by immigrants who displaced indigenous people. There is hardly a country in the world that can claim a different past. Tribes became empires; empires fell and became countries; countries sent explorers to find new lands. Even today, nations fight to assimilate and conquer. We feel as though we are constantly on the verge of World War III, or about to be overcome by the next pandemic. (I am binge watching and recommend The Last Ship on Netflix. It’s patriotism on steroids!)

As someone who reads and writes historical fiction, history is always top of mind for me. I just finished Min Jin Lee’s Pachinko, which beautifully covers six generations of Korean history from 1910 to 1989.

As I write my second book—set between 1918 and 1930—I find myself constantly uncovering immigrant history and the vital role immigrants played in surviving the Great War, Spanish Flu and the Great Depression. In today’s political climate, there is a loud push to rewrite history. It feels as though some of us simply don’t want to face what it actually takes to build a nation.

As a second-generation immigrant, I was surprised to hear the grand declaration that “America is back.” It reminds me of when people ask if I have “found Jesus”—I never knew he was lost?

Worse, I recently heard the words: “Send them into exile. We need to make space for the people who support me.” Those are the classic words of a fascist, yet they were uttered by an American.

The July 4th Washout

Living in Baltimore, just 30 miles from Washington, D.C., we spent this 4th of July trapped under a oppressive heat dome paired with severe thunderstorm warnings. Mother Nature canceled parades, postponed fireworks, and put a definitive damper on family cookouts. What is a country to do when its birthday plans are ruined and Madison Square Garden is already rented out?

Since I am descended from the last pagans, I decided to look into Lithuanian gods and goddesses to see if any of them would wish bad weather on an occasion like this. It turns out they weren’t into revenge; they were into reverence. They seemed far more benevolent than many humans today.

Unfortunately, our current weather reality isn’t looking much better. Rain dates are already scheduled to be rained out, and oppressive heat has become a worldwide event. Heat domes can kill. As Fox Weather reported:

“The massive heat dome that set up shop over the eastern half of the country is finally starting to weaken, but not before it packed a punch and killed nearly two dozen people... Extreme heat gripped hundreds of millions of Americans starting Tuesday and lasting through the July 4th holiday weekend.”

According to meteorological organizations like the Copernicus Climate Change Service, the sobering scientific consensus is that 2023 may have been the coolest summer for the rest of our lives.

We can’t wait for better weather to celebrate America’s 250th birthday—or can we? It turns out we can. We can take a whole year to mark the semiquincentennial of the Declaration of Independence.

Dueling Speeches & Divided Realities

The heat dome kept me trapped inside on the 4th. I spent the day finishing my book, completing five online jigsaw puzzles, and listening to competing political speeches. A few core definitions kept swirling through my mind as I watched the programming:

• The Constitution: A system that limits power to prevent tyranny through checks and balances, protects individual rights from government overreach, and stands as the supreme law of the land.

• Capitalism: An economic system driven by private ownership, where investments, prices, and production are determined primarily by free-market competition.

• Conflict of Interest: A direct clash between a person’s private interests and their official responsibilities in a position of trust.

As I listened to our political leaders speak, I noticed a stark divide in how America’s upcoming 250th birthday is being handled. It perfectly mirrors the tension between public service and private interest.

America 250

• Origins: Established by Congress in 2016 (a bipartisan initiative signed by President Obama) to coordinate educational initiatives and public programs.

• Events: Focuses on grassroots and nationwide celebrations, including neighborhood block parties and historical exhibits.

• Funding: Supported by federal dollars allocated by Congress and private nonprofit donations.

• Oversight: Required to submit annual spending and funding reports directly to Congress.

Freedom 250

• Origins: Created via executive order by President Trump to establish the “White House Task Force on Celebrating America’s 250th Birthday”.

• Events: Manages landmark, administration-led events on the National Mall, such as the 16-day Great American State Fair, fireworks, and White House-connected sports showcases (like UFC matches).

• Funding: Operates primarily as an external public-private partnership, raising money via private donations and leveraging federal event grants.

• Oversight: Contained entirely within the executive branch, meaning it operates without direct congressional oversight.

• The program included the new Air Force One, a $400 million aircraft generously gifted to the United States by the Qatari government.

The contrast became even clearer in the speeches themselves. Consider the different lenses through which our leaders view the nation right now:

Donald Trump:

“After 250 years, unlike so many others in the world, in this country we have freedom of speech, freedom of religion, equal justice under the law — although I wasn’t treated that well, but we won’t get into that... And the right to keep and bear arms...”

Bill Clinton:

“With the help of lifetime appointees to the Supreme Court and a compliant Congress, they [Republicans] have weaponized government to settle personal scores, prosecute enemies, stamp out free speech, and made the federal government a new profit center for themselves and their allies.”

JD Vance:

“Reject the view of your nation that sees only its sins, but not its grace and its greatness. Everything that we have done... we have done together, not as citizens against each other, but as a common people working toward a common future.”

Josh Shapiro:

“...What we’ve got to focus on — not just as a party but in politics in general — are real deliverables for people on getting stuff done for people and shying away from this performative politics that just makes noise but doesn’t make anybody’s life better.”

Realism vs. Pessimism: Why I Fly My Flag

As we celebrate American independence, many of us lull ourselves into believing we are completely safe. We aren’t.

People sometimes ask why this second-generation Lithuanian flies a Ukrainian flag off her front porch. It’s not because I don’t believe in America. It’s because I feel the “pain of blood.” It is written directly into my DNA.

In her piece, What Ukraine Means for Lithuanians Haunted by Soviet Past Inga Rudzinskaite-Colman writes:

“The deportations of Ukrainians to Russia make me think of the cattle trains that took an estimated quarter of a million Lithuanians in the 1940s to the frozen wastelands and gulags in Siberia. Tens of thousands perished along the way. More than 30 years after the fall of the Soviet Union, Ukrainians are fighting for their very right to exist. Our part of Europe understands the stakes, and we know exactly who the enemy is. Ukrainians are fighting for our future, too.”

My mother’s two cousins were among those tens of thousands who were sent to Siberia.

The Future is in Our Hands

Substack readers generally know what is at stake and how vital it is to vote. Yet, despite record turnouts in recent years, 80 million Americans still do not vote.

When surveyed, their reasons are revealing:

• 29% are not registered to vote

• 23% are simply not interested in politics

• 20% do not like any of the candidates

• 16% feel their vote won’t make a difference

• 10% remain completely undecided

What every single one of us can do right now is engage in conversations—not by telling people who to vote for, but by talking about why it matters. We can be real-world examples of what it looks like to realize that the right to vote is something that can actually be lost. Become familiar with the Safeguard American Voter Eligibility Act, especially if you are a woman who changed your name.

What about you? Do you view voting as a fundamental right, or a civic obligation? I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below so we can discuss how to protect this country we love.

Many events were happening in June, starting with my birthday. But as the month comes to a close, I want to look back with a nod to Father’s Day and an observation on the evolving definition of the masculine.

This past Saturday, I got into a bit of a tiff on a neighborhood forum. A local woman had posted a polite request asking neighbors not to set off fireworks for the entire week surrounding the holiday. Her reasoning was sound: it triggers people with PTSD, sends pets into absolute panic, and keeps everyone from sleeping.

Surprisingly, the backlash she received was swift, intense, and mostly from men. The defensiveness of the responses immediately reminded me of the phrase “disenfranchised white male” that surfaced so prominently during the 2016 election cycle. Curious about where that cultural tension stands today, I decided to do a little digging.

Here is what I found.

The Modern Narrative vs. The 90/10 Rule

Earlier this year, on January 13, 2026, Judd Legum touched on this exact cultural friction in his piece, The truth about being a white man in America:

“America is a big place and there are undoubtedly some instances of “reverse discrimination” against white men in the country. But Trump’s claim that, as a group, white men are discriminated against in higher education and the job market is flatly false.”

This brings to mind the 90/10 theory: ninety percent of people generally do the “right thing” and fly under the radar, while the ten percent who are disruptive or extreme absorb ninety percent of the attention. To me, this is exactly what we are witnessing in the current cultural discourse.

Looking Back to Move Forward

I graduated from college on the cusp of the second wave of feminism. It was an era of monumental shifts: the passage of the Equal Pay Act and landmark Supreme Court decisions like Griswold v. Connecticut (1965) and Roe v. Wade (1973). But progress has always faced friction. Even though Congress passed the Equal Rights Amendment in 1972, a conservative backlash ensured it fell short of the states needed for ratification.

Living through that era meant experiencing firsthand gender discrimination and the palpable angst of men who openly claimed I was “taking a man’s job away.”

Even today, some of my male contemporaries still look at my engineer daughter and comment on her “non-traditional” career choice. These same mindsets continue to hold a disproportionate amount of power in our legislatures and supreme courts. When will it ever end? No one lives forever. Sadly, we Baby Boomers currently have far more funerals to attend than doctor’s visits.

But there is genuine hope on the horizon. Shortly after the 2020 election, Torsten Landsberg captured the beginning of a shift:

“Traditional gender roles are no longer valid, but men are dealing with the new expectations of masculinity in different ways. From vulnerability to metrosexuality, gender is transforming….. There is nothing bad to be said about the person who is able to empathize with others. The modern man is also able to admit weaknesses, even flaws and defeats...”

A New Trend in Masculinity

Last week, I wrote about the Pride Day celebrations in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. Amidst the joy, I witnessed a fascinating trend in male fashion. I’m not referring to the drag queens or cross-dressers. These were clearly heterosexual men with neatly trimmed hair and beards, comfortably holding hands with their female partners—while wearing skirts.

Naturally, I had to validate what I was seeing. Sure enough, journalist Tina Lončar recently highlighted this exact movement:

“...How men are wearing skirts this season with waistcoats, shirts and blazers, they have become an essential element of unconventional menswear tailoring.”

It was incredibly refreshing to be part of a celebration where “anything goes,” provided it remains polite and civil. Of course, there were still a few self-proclaimed “alpha kings” gunning their Harleys and blaring music loaded with profanity. (And if a guy feels he’s too much of a “Beta,” I suppose he can always find a boot camp for that!) According to right-wing commentator Nick Adams, “being an alpha male means, among other things, marrying a woman who is both hot and low maintenance, and never apologizing.”

Please excuse my digression, but I have a different take.

Real men wear skirts, do laundry, care for children, and can be incredibly low maintenance. The same goes for trans people. At the end of the day, it isn’t about rigid gender boxes—it’s just called being human. And as for me? This hot fossil of a Baby Boomer will happily apologize if I’ve offended anyone. I am still a work in progress.

Striking the Balance: The Divine Masculine

I think a wonderful note to end on comes from Scott Hilburn’s reflections on the rise of the Divine Masculine:

“When teaching men about our Divine nature, I often use the Yin-Yang symbol. The circle represents Divinity which is split in two: Masculine and Feminine. Each one has the other within it, symbolized by the little dot of the opposite color within each side. We all have Masculine and Feminine within us. Ideally, we are able to use both of these expressions to serve ourselves and the world.

Both qualities are equally important and do not exist without the other. As we embrace the healthiest version of our dominant quality, we have the ability to more fully receive the other quality. So this means as men embrace their Divine Masculine Energy, they now can receive and understand the Divine Feminine within them and around them more readily.”

I propose we continue to embrace both the feminine and the masculine in all of us.

Let’s Chat: From neighborhood tiffs over fireworks to men rocking skirts in Portsmouth, June gave us plenty to look back on. How do you find balance between the masculine and feminine energies in your own life? Leave a comment and let me know—and remember, we’re all works in progress!

Esquire Magazine 2023

I am incredibly proud of the fact that I mailed in my ballot before traveling north to spend a week with friends—most of whom I met during my graduate school days as fellow students or faculty. Returning to Portsmouth, New Hampshire always highlights a stark contrast to Baltimore, where I was born and raised. It is the difference between living in a metropolis or a microcosm.

The 17 years I spent living in New Hampshire taught me a great deal about socio-economic diversity. To put it in perspective, from 1972 to 1989, the population of New Hampshire was 95% white, while the remaining 5% was categorized as “all other.” Despite prevailing myths about urban vs. rural safety, that 5% certainly did not drive up crime statistics.

It wasn’t until 1995 that New Hampshire turned its attention to establishing the Black Heritage Trail of New Hampshire, which beautifully addresses the “Thirst for Freedom: From NH’s Slave Trade to Its Civil Rights Movement.” Needless to say, the history and impact of civil rights look vastly different in Baltimore than they do in New Hampshire. Baltimore has much more to atone for—but also much more to celebrate during Juneteenth.

While New Hampshire’s recent weekend celebrations focused heavily on Pride Month, Baltimore hosted AFRAM, one of the largest African American festivals on the East Coast.

Maryland vs. New Hampshire

Both of my husbands were New Hampshire natives, and they were the reason I relocated north, and eventually, back south. One was French Canadian and the other a Yankee. Even though I was embraced as the “wife of,” the locals occasionally made it clear that I was still an outsider.

But that isn’t why I left.

I returned to Baltimore to become the primary caregiver for my mother during her time in home hospice. Eventually, I inherited my childhood home and made the conscious decision to stay rather than sell. The rest is history. Baltimore is home again.

Fortunately, I love to travel. Family and friends have a way of spreading out, and I am the one who usually boards a train, a plane, or both to visit the family and friends who share my history.

Our country has changed greatly since 1972, and the cultural gaps between states tend to shrink thanks to technology. In New Hampshire, the IT industry has completely replaced the shoe factories, tanneries, and automotive parts manufacturers that were already on the verge of obsolescence when I first arrived—jobs that were ultimately lost to cheaper labor overseas.

A Convoluted Career Path

My history with the workforce started incredibly early: I actually began earning Social Security when I was just six years old as a professional child model for Hutzler’s department store. I like to joke with people that I “ate myself out of a job” when I turned 18, but the truth is that college took priority.

Beyond modeling, I remained a contingent employee at Hutzler’s working in the back offices during high school and college vacations. I finally quit just before my July 1972 wedding. By August, I was working as a clerk in a New Hampshire shoe factory.

My path was rarely linear. I went from clerical work to sales, transitioned into academia, and finally retired at the age of 62.

Setting Priorities

Like so many women, I have worked my entire life. That is exactly why exercising my right to vote was an absolute necessity before I ever stepped onto a plane for this trip.

My NH friend showed me a tote bag she just had to buy.

Please take the time to read every word printed on it, and make sure you are voting for what you truly want this country to stand for.

Over to You: Drop a comment below and let me know if any of the reasons listed on the bag resonate with your own reasons for voting this year. Do you see yourself living in a metropolis or a microcosm? Let’s chat!

Eye Candy

It is a great compliment to have my novel, Ona’s Tears, compared to Kristin Hannah’s The Nightingale. Her book is almost twice as long as mine, plus she took twice as long to do the research and write it—her acknowledgements were at least two pages long! One distinct advantage she had was the ability to interview people who were personally familiar with World War II.

By contrast, Ona’s Tears is set prior to the Great War, covering a pocket of Lithuanian history you will not find in many novels written in English.

“Historical fiction bridges the gap between abstract historical knowledge and lived human experience. By bringing readers into the emotional, social, and moral worlds of people from the past, historical fiction allows history to be felt, not just understood. Such feelings and understanding for people from long-ago worlds create empathy.”

History was never my educational strong suit. Do you actually know when or where the War of 1812 happened? That was always a trick question that many of us get wrong. Like me, a lot of us truly learned our history through sweeping novels like Gone with the Wind or Roots.

The Escape vs. The Reality

According to the charts, the most popular book genres right now include:

• Romantasy & Romance

• Psychological & Techno-Thrillers

• Genre-Bending Fiction

• Cozy Fantasy & Science Fiction

• Feminist Horror & “Dark Academia”

Do you see a theme? There is a writing course circulating right now that promises to help you write a complete manuscript in eight weeks for $200. None of the trending genres above strictly require rigorous historical research or deep cultural perspectives. Instead, they provide a means of escape—and there is nothing wrong with that. It can be incredibly healthy.

But escape alone doesn’t bridge the gaps in our current world.

Bridging the Gap

“Our culture tells us to be unafraid of our differences and shows us how extremely practiced we already are at integrating the influences we all bring to the table. That should bring us hope.” — Anthony Foxx

Prejudice and class divisions will always exist among us. Is it possible for humans to live in harmony, or are we trapped in a cycle of the “survival of the fittest”? Miriam has given us some interesting examples of what we are up against:

• The natural process by which organisms best adjusted to their environment are most successful in surviving and reproducing - We see this cold, evolutionary doctrine everywhere. Writers point to it in nature, where the snapping turtles and snakes in the woods punctuate daily life.

• Often used figuratively to describe a situation, attitude, etc., of fierce or ruthless competition - We use it to describe our human systems—warning that Fashion Week is “survival of the fittest,” or arguing that competitive, “fit” companies are the ones that create jobs.

Left unchecked, it is a ruthless way to view humanity. But historical fiction reminds us that we are capable of more than just fierce competition; we are capable of empathy and cooperation.

One American Identity, Two Distinct Meanings

Right now, partisans from different political realities routinely misunderstand their fellow citizens on a basic level. It feels as though we are no longer operating from a position where, despite our differences, we share a common identity. The very definition of what it means to be an “American” has diverged.

Finding common ground means looking past the polarization to recognize where we actually align. Studies consistently show that the vast majority of U.S. adults broadly agree on practical, day-to-day priorities: the need for good jobs, affordable healthcare, a lower cost of living, and shared passions for culture, sports, and food.

How do we begin living in harmony? It starts with us as individuals.

In a spiritual context, harmony is a state of equilibrium—an alignment of mind, body, and spirit operating without internal conflict to allow for authentic peace. In a broader context, that individual peace ripples outward into world harmony: a global state of mutual understanding and equitable cooperation among cultures.

A Summer Reading List for the Soul

If you are looking for pure beach reads to help you escape this season, Oprah has plenty of recommendations on her 35 Best Beach Reads list.

But if you want to learn more about what we as humans—and Americans—have in common, I recommend diving into the Best American Historical Fiction list.

As for me? I am currently working on part two of the sequel to Ona’s Tears. I am specifically diving into two books to find inspiration for my Russian governess character, Stanislova. I’m hoping they will help me master the art of creating narrative tension (as suggested by that 8-week course syllabus!).

• The House of Special Purpose by John Boyne
  A beautifully imagined novel told through the perspective of a personal bodyguard to the Tsarevich, moving seamlessly between the twilight of the Romanov court and modern-day London.

• The Romanov Prophecy by Steve Berry
  A fast-paced modern thriller that weaves a mystery around a cryptic message left by Rasputin and the lingering possibility of an imperial survivor.

Summer is traditionally a time to “lighten up,” but my suitcase tells a different story. Alongside my summer clothes for an upcoming visit to Portsmouth, New Hampshire, I’ve packed Ariel Lawhorn’s I Was Anastasia. It follows a woman pulled from a canal “with countless horrific scars” and is absolutely loaded with heavy historical detail.

It is definitely not a light beach read. But it is exactly the kind of book that makes history feel alive.

What about you? Do you have a summer reading list packed yet? Are you escaping, or are you bridging the gap? Let me know in the comments below!

Magnific

June Gives Us Opportunities to Celebrate

Graduations, wedding anniversaries, birthdays, the end of the school year, Father’s Day, Juneteenth, and the Summer Solstice (we all have pagan roots).

As we celebrate—and, in some cases, mourn—we can find direction from the words of a prayer for social justice:

“...that barriers which divide us may crumble, suspicions disappear, and hatreds cease; that our divisions being healed, we may live in justice and peace…”

For me, June got off to a good start. I ended last week’s post with a list of things one should do after a Blue Moon. Most of my list got checked off while tending to my perennial garden. Cards, phone conversations, and text messages on my birthday added a wonderful human touch to the workflow.

The Blue Moon Checklist:

• Release what has fully run its course

• Complete a cycle

• See the truth of a situation

• Make a big-picture decision

• Reconnect with intuition and divine feminine energy

• Name what you actually want next

• Do the thing that lights you up

A Formula for Pivoting

I have known my oldest friend since her December birth, six months after mine. Her lovely birthday card to me arrived with a tear-off calendar page for June 2 with a to-do list

My June To-Do List:

• Make your own path & keep on shining

• Capture the moment & protect your heart

• Listen to your intuition & embrace alone time

• Brighten someone’s day & seek out serenity

• Explore new places & see the glass half-full

• Appreciate your assets & turn up the tunes

At the week’s end, Sunday’s sermon and chapel prayers inspired me to focus on the word “pivot,” specifically how it was used in a recent graduation speech. The new graduates were encouraged to pivot frequently while pursuing their dreams. Both of the lists above demonstrate exactly how to do that.

Curious about the bigger picture, I asked AI if America needs a national pivot. The response was telling:

“Whether America needs a national ‘pivot’ depends heavily on the policy focus. Economists and strategists are currently debating several vital shifts, weighing the impacts of recent federal tax cuts, trade tariffs, and immigration policies on inflation and job markets.”

Last week’s national and world news actually made me hopeful, because my love bucket—my glass—was more than half full. Not all the news was good, but my intuition and divine feminine energy pulled me toward the light. Challenges require action, and they require releasing what has run its course.

We can choose to move toward words of hope, or we can cling to a need to see the glass as half empty and blame others. We have the power to name what we want to do, even if we do not say it out loud. Perhaps America will finally make a big-picture decision that we can all agree to. Party over politics is a divisive, losing strategy.

July 4th is Less Than a Month Away

Most Americans celebrate July 4th as the day the U.S. won its independence from Britain. But millions also recognize a second Independence Day: Juneteenth, which marks the day in 1865 when the last enslaved Americans in Texas finally learned they were free.

Tragically, this freedom came late for that select group, and today, systemic efforts are still being made to chip away at voting equality. The ongoing judicial battles over the Voting Rights Act threaten a half-century’s worth of hard-won gains.

Early Voting and Due Diligence

Here in Maryland, early voting begins on June 11. This year, I am especially exercising my right to due diligence—a concept that my friend Miriam reminds me exists powerfully in both law and business:

• In Law: The care that a reasonable person exercises to avoid harm to other persons or their property.

• In Business: The research and analysis of a company or organization done in preparation for a transaction.

I will do the right thing that lights me up. I will vote, and I will remind everyone to do the same.

We must see the truth of our political situation through rigorous research, avoiding the trap of fake news by actively comparing sources. After all, would you buy a car just because you liked the way it looked and your friend drove one?

(Though I have to confess... that is exactly how I bought my first car, a bright green Datsun!)

A Lithuanian Perspective

Not many people are familiar with Lithuanian or Ukrainian history, which is precisely one of the reasons I wrote Ona’s Tears. I cannot stress enough the importance of recognizing the early warning signs of the rise of fascism. Vladimir Putin openly wants to re-establish the USSR, yet we often lull ourselves into thinking fascism could never exist in America.

Let me know what you think in the comments section below. Your voice, your research, and your vote are important.

Let’s discuss: How are you planning to “pivot” or practice due diligence this June?

Do you ever get the notion that the universe is sending you a message?

Last week, my messages had a distinct theme: snakes. It started with a poem, then a news clip, a text message from a friend, a deep dive into Lithuanian folklore, a phone conversation, a shirt emblem, and two pictures from local yards.

Seven different sources caused me to look for the meaning behind the message. Ultimately, I realized I was being sent a good omen. Nothing bad to see here.

Snake Facts: Friends vs. Foes

Snakes can be friends or foes. It helps to know the difference, although “good” snakes can easily act like deadly ones when threatened.

The pictures sent to me allowed me to identify a Black Rat snake and a Colorado Bull Snake. Both like to eat the small mammals we don’t want in our gardens. Both will actively avoid humans—unless you block their escape route, causing them to hiss and possibly bite.

In the News: Just in case you missed it, RFK Jr. has been in the snake news lately. Last week, he wrangled two non-venomous snakes and a rattlesnake. One bit him. The man has talents we never expected. Luckily, all three snakes were unharmed and returned to a safe environment.

Closer to home, grass snakes live right in my garden. The only one I have seen this year was the unfortunate victim of the neighbor’s cats—as confirmed by her son when he examined the uneaten half: “They bring them in the house all the time.”

Lithuanian Folklore & The Queen of Grass Snakes

All these encounters made me remember something my former Lithuanian Department Chair once told me. We shared the same penchant for sarcastic humor—a trait that often evolves as a non-violent response to oppression. He told me that snakes were deeply honored by us Lithuanians and historically kept as household pets. They even cleaned up after babies who never wore diapers!

Intrigued, I took a deep dive into the source of this reptilian reverence. It led me to the myth of Eglė, a young maiden who discovers a grass snake coiled around the sleeve of her blouse after bathing in a lake with her sisters. The grass snake demands that Eglė pledge herself to him in marriage in exchange for her clothing. She relents and agrees.

It’s a fascinating, sweeping story—far too long to include here—but it is well worth reading. Grab a cup of tea on a rainy afternoon and read the full tale of Eglė, the Queen of Grass Snakes (a wonderful post from 2016).

What Wiki Says About Snakes

Even before the Bible, the serpent was revered and feared across cultures as a symbol of duality, transformation, and the eternal cycle.

• In Psychology: Carl Jung interpreted the serpent as an archetype of the unconscious mind and personal transformation.

• In Medicine: The caduceus—a short staff entwined by two serpents and surmounted by wings—has become a universal medical symbol. This was the exact emblem I spotted on a t-shirt last Monday.

Of course, my friend Miriam notes that the noun “snake” has a few distinct definitions:

1. Any of numerous limbless scaled reptiles with a long tapering body and salivary glands often modified to produce venom.

2. A worthless or treacherous fellow.

3. Something resembling a snake (not to be confused with a garden hose).

Take Me In, Tender Woman

I can think of three “tender women” in this post: Eve, Eglė, and the subject of the poem, who were all taken in by Miriam’s second definition of a snake. Just this past week, Sunday’s Gospel covered the seven days of creation, reintroducing us to Eve.

The poem that started this entire journey for me is titled The Snake, written by Oscar Brown. It happens to be president Donald Trump’s favorite poem to recite. He likes to boast that the electorate “got what they asked for” by electing him, quoting the poem more than 35 distinct times over the years.

This usage caused Oscar Brown’s daughters to send Trump cease-and-desist letters, noting it is antithetical to everything their father stood for. As one of his daughters stated on CNN:

“The elephant in the room is that Trump is the living embodiment of the snake that my father wrote about in that song.”

Once in a Blue Moon

I want to close on an upbeat note. The Universe was clearly trying to tell me something ahead of my birthday on June 2nd.

Since I am proud that my ancestry holds the title of being the last Pagans, I am happy to share what I recently found in a pagan grimoire. (Click at your own risk; I am not advocating for the rituals and spells!)

“A Blue Moon adds the feeling of a second chance, a turning point, or an opportunity that doesn’t come around often.”

I accept the invitation given to me below:

• Release what has fully run its course

• Complete a cycle

• See the truth of a situation

• Make a big-picture decision

• Reconnect with intuition and divine feminine energy

• Name what you actually want next

• Do the thing that lights you up”

It pairs perfectly with a fortune cookie I saved from a month ago: “June will bring exciting new adventures and opportunities.”

What about you? What is the Blue Moon inviting you to do?

Weekend of Rain

In my part of the world, Memorial Day weekend festivities have mostly been canceled by rain—and I am glad.

The true reason for this four-day weekend so often gets overshadowed by celebrations, when it should be a time of remembrance for those who lost their lives fighting wars for our freedom. It should be filled with men and women who dusted off their uniforms to march in parades to honor comrades who died. These are the people who may carry the weight of PTSD and survivor’s guilt. Cookouts, parties, and fireworks seem entirely inappropriate when you stop to truly think about it.

Personally, this is an especially mournful weekend because of the people I know who recently passed: a neighbor, a best friend’s spouse, an in-law, and many others. There are also the Americans who recently lost their lives in military operations that were never intended to be wars. Confronting this collective loss naturally turns the mind toward the ultimate question: What comes next?

The Colbert Questionnaire

I read an article from the Christian Post regarding Stephen Colbert’s final late-night interview segment. The article claimed Colbert was a “heretic” based on how he answered his Colbert Questionnaire: “What do you think happens when we die?”

Colbert replied:

“I think of, almost like, it’s more like a feeling, and the feeling is that when we die, I think there is some continuance of some kind. But it’s like a dispersion of the self into some other greater being. And I don’t have any other feelings beyond that.”

What I Believe Happens When We Die

The truth is, no one knows for sure. Like Colbert, I believe we return to our origin. Humans existed long before the Bible was written. People are born all over a world composed of many religious and non-religious beliefs; therefore, no single belief prevails over another.

Also like Colbert, I was raised Catholic. I came to my own enlightenment in the third grade, when our nun explained the “resurrection of the dead.” She warned us that we had to be careful about what we were buried in, because on the last day, our coffins will pop open and we will come out of them to be reunited with our loved ones.

This blew my eight-year-old mind. In all the open-casket wakes I had attended thus far (and there were many), the men were dressed in suits and ties wearing brand-new dress shoes. The women wore nighties and bedroom slippers. The one exception was my ten-year-old cousin, who wore a sweater instead of a suit. The image of a graveyard popping open to reveal women dressed for bed and men dressed for work felt absurd.

By third grade, all of us had memorized the Baltimore Catechism. Question 21 directly challenged what the nun was telling us, proving God could not have created the literal, physical version of heaven she described:

• Question 21: Is God all-wise, all-holy, all-merciful, and all-just?

• Answer: Yes, God is all-wise, all-holy, all-merciful, and all-just.

I don’t remember “Sister Mary Gumdrop’s” real name, but I would like to thank her for sparking the philosophical section of my brain.

Colbert’s idea of the “dispersion of the self into some other greater being” is exactly what I believe. This epiphany actually came to me during a Bible study of Revelation 21:16, describing the New Jerusalem:

The city was shaped like a cube, because it was just as high as it was wide. When the angel measured the city, it was about 2,400 kilometers high and 2,400 kilometers wide.

To me, it resembles Star Trek’s Borg—a collective, unified consciousness. I think the writers knew the Bible reference. The Borg is a cube!

America’s Answer to Where We Go

There is no single correct answer, and our country was built on that very fact. Religion played a major role in the American Revolution, which is why freedom of religion is protected by the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. It explicitly prevents the government from prosecuting “heresy.”

Instead of a traditional heaven or hell, I find myself believing in the Old Soul Theory.

“An Old Soul is someone who has lived many lives before this one, possessing a depth of wisdom far beyond their years.”

This isn’t strict reincarnation. An old soul can abide in any living thing—even a tree, as many pagans believe. All that has life has a soul.

Consider the timeline: the Earth is approximately 4.54 billion years old. Humans are about 300,000 years old. Christianity is roughly 2,000 years old. “Soul age” simply refers to the level of developmental maturity a soul has reached across a long cycle of incarnations. You can believe this or not, according to your personal comfort level.

Room Enough for Us All

I think there is room enough for all of us to believe whatever gives us solace.

The Pledge of Allegiance reads:

“I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.”

Let us not forget the indivisible part this Memorial Day. Let us honor all who died while protecting our First Amendment right to freedom of speech and belief—regardless of what those individual beliefs might have been.

AI generated 1950’s dysfunctional family

Why I Wrote My Book

Several of my subscribers have already read my novel, Ona’s Tears, which launched on November 1, 2025. Since then, many of you have shared your thoughts with me, and May has been a whirlwind of book signings. I’ve met so many wonderful people—some bought the book, some took my card, but everyone started a conversation.

The question I hear most often is simple: “Tell me why you wrote this book.”

My answer usually depends on who is asking, but at its core, my motivation was to understand how my family became dysfunctional. (I know there are at least two of you reading this who came from perfectly functional families—I would love to read your reactions to this in the comments!)

Depending on what catches a reader’s eye at my table, the story behind the book changes:

• The Culturally Curious: Some people come up just to get a better look at my Lithuanian amber necklace, ring, and earrings. Many pick up the book simply because of the cover, which features flax flowers on a background of linen. I often display a traditional Lithuanian linen cloth and explain just how vital flax was to the Lithuanian economy.

• The History Buffs: For those interested in historical fiction, I explain the deep research required to uncover a story my grandparents were too afraid to tell. Most of our anecdotal family stories, passed down during holidays and funerals, are sprinkled throughout the book—alongside traditional Lithuanian dishes you can easily look up for recipes.

• The Baltimore Locals: My grandparents lived on Herkimer Street in Pigtown. This fact always grabs the locals. These readers can follow my characters down familiar streets and see the landmarks in their minds. For instance, Old Major, on the corner of S. Carey and Herkimer, is the bar my father frequented when we visited my widowed grandmother on Friday nights. I never thought my dad’s favorite haunt would become my favorite bar! Last Saturday, someone told me that Dad is probably sitting on the stool next to me. I like to believe my chaperone will hang around until he’s no longer needed, just as our folklore dictates.

Patrons of the Lithuanian Hall on Hollins Street have thanked me for putting this history into words, and my most recent buyer was actually from the Embassy in D.C.

As an author, you can feel incredibly naked because you are exposing yourself to the world. Everyone who reads a book forms their own unique impression. It feels a lot like giving birth to a child—or an idea. Like a new mother, I found myself remembering Chris Argyris’s book, Reasoning, Learning, and Action: Individual and Organizational, which I used to teach an Organizational Behavior course back in the 1980s. Ideas and books truly take on a life of their own.

How to Find Ona’s Tears

Because I am a self-published author, there isn’t a massive publishing company stocking my books in major brick-and-mortar stores (though you can absolutely walk in and ask them to special order a copy).

If you prefer ordering online, searching my name or the book title will bring it up on major platforms. You might even find it on a certain convenient, free-shipping site if you have a membership—though it has been a bit of a roller-coaster lately! Last week, a relative called to tell me the “great news” that my book was sold out there. That certainly explained why my April sales numbers looked so strange.

I looked into why this happens, and it turns out that certain dominant online vendors heavily favor books printed through their own Direct Publishing system. They sometimes show artificial stock delays to encourage publishers to switch over from other Print-on-Demand (POD) sources like IngramSpark.

The good news? It is widely available across formats:

• Kindle: At a recent signing, a new mother was delighted to find it on Kindle. Her husband had bought it for her so she could read on the go, and I highly recommend this budget-friendly, handy option.

• IngramSpark: This is the best option for shipping Ona’s Tears directly to you in a timely fashion.

• Local Libraries: I am incredibly proud to share that the Baltimore County Public Library has accepted my book for their shelves. I am already planning an upcoming local author event with them!

• Your Local Library: You can always ask them to add Ona’s Tears to their shelf.

Last, But Not Least...

Whether I sell eleven books or two books at a signing, the absolute best part of this journey is meeting people. I have had so many beautiful conversations where readers have shared their own heritage and family stories. I love hearing, “My mother would love this!” from people looking for the perfect meaningful gift.

Right now, I am about one-third of the way through my follow-up novel—Rooted in Baltimore is the working title. Because of that, I am always anxious for feedback on Ona’s Tears. Most of your comments have been deeply complimentary, but as an author, it’s just as important to know where the hiccups are.

If you leave a comment below, let’s keep it spoiler-free for those who haven’t finished, but feel free to leave a plug about why others should read it! I would also love to answer any questions you have about the background of the story.

Happy Reading!

Anna Jarvis around 1909. Image courtesy of the Library of Congress.

“You have the most important job there is in America or any place else... I just want to wish you all a very happy Mother’s Day.” — President Donald J. Trump, Mother’s Day 2026

The Origin of the Day

It’s always nice when the President of the United States emphasizes the importance of mothers; without them, none of us would exist. Yet, if only mothers could be compensated for this “most important job.” While brunch and flowers are lovely, they often obscure the true origin of Mother’s Day. It was meant to be more than a Hallmark moment.

The Mother’s Day origin story has gained prominence this year. When founded by Julia Ward Howe, greeting cards were not on the agenda. She agreed with the sentiment that mothers shape the world, famously stating:

“I earnestly ask that a general congress of women, without limit of nationality, may be appointed… to promote the alliance of the different nationalities, the amicable settlement of international questions, the great and general interests of peace.”

Later, Anna Jarvis established the national holiday to honor her own mother, who birthed more than twelve children. She chose the second Sunday in May—the anniversary of her mother’s death. Eventually, President Wilson issued the first national proclamation in 1914, just before the world descended into the Great War.

Tradition and Memory

Mother’s Day can be bittersweet for women whose children have died and for daughters who have buried their mothers. Anna Jarvis chose white carnations to celebrate her mother’s memory. My own mother made corsages, choosing a specific color for each: her corsage was white because her mother had passed, while my sister and I wore pink or red. In church yesterday, all the women received yellow carnations—symbolic of friendship and new beginnings.

Beyond the Binary

During coffee hour, the conversation turned to single mothers who act as both mother and father daily. Kudos go to the noncustodial parents who play an active role, yet we must acknowledge the fathers who are absent even when physically present—and, in all fairness, the mothers who are less available.

The good news is that the existence of the Divine Feminine suggests that complementary energies exist within every being. As Emily McGowan notes, we must move beyond a morality judged solely on the “sins” of one lady who once gave a guy an apple. Single parents are innately endowed with the balanced energies needed to raise children. I recommend reading Emily McGowan’s complete article.

The Goal is Enlightenment

Between Sunday’s sermon and a presentation on coping skills for our current political climate, a theme emerged: we spend so much energy trying to convince “the other side” they are wrong that we lose sight of what we actually stand for. But when is the other side “dead wrong?”

As Proverbs 28:13 says: “A person who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if that person confesses and forsakes those mistakes, another chance is given.”

“There is nothing wrong with making mistakes, but one should always make new ones. Repeating mistakes is a hallmark of dim consciousness.” — Dave Sim

I admit when I make a mistake. When confronting a nemesis, I find it more powerful to say: “I must have made a mistake.” Being right is not my goal. Enlightenment is.

Language and the Goddess Within

Language evolved to specify gender, but it is generally agreed that the word “God” derives from a Proto-Indo-European neuter passive perfect participle. I once attended a retreat co-led by Joan Borysenko on the importance of the goddess within us. She began with the original Aramaic of the Lord’s Prayer:

Abwoon d’bwashmaya (O Birther! Father-Mother of the Cosmos)

The word Abba (father) replaced Abwoon when scholars reasoned Jesus was praying to a paternal figure, but the original version was non-binary. Gender identification is not a “new thing.” That retreat was mystical; in guided meditation, I saw the trail of mothers stretching back through my grandmothers to Mitochondrial Eve. It was a deeply grounding experience.

Before Eve: Power and Balance

Nemesis, in Greek mythology, was the goddess of divine retribution. She was feared as the deity who delivered justice against hubris—the sin of excessive pride.

When we recognize the Divine Feminine within every person and move beyond gender wars, we become less divisive. Our world today requires the goddess within all of us to rise up and assert our right to be both feared and respected. To claim that power, we must find balance:

• Balance Fear and Respect: The most effective power uses both.

• Demonstrate Competence: Respect requires proof of capability.

• Set Clear Boundaries: Consequences keep systems in line.

• Be Fair, Not Cruel: Unjust punishment only breeds hatred.

• Prioritize Truth: Respect collapses without honesty.

• Adapt to Context: In crises, lean on strength; in stability, lean on respect.

I would love to read your thoughts about this in the comments below.

Daylight and the sound of the ocean woke me up this morning. I traveled to the edge of the world to spend a few days in Ocean City before the “June Bugs” descend and take over the boardwalk.

My parents let me take the 1963 Ford Galaxie convertible to spend a week in an apartment here after high school graduation. My friends and I had worked weekends at Montgomery Ward’s headquarters; we were required to join the Teamsters Union and were promptly fired as soon as our dues were fulfilled. We didn’t care. We were about to become June Bugs ourselves—this was our last fling before full-time summer jobs and the Great Scatter toward different colleges. We had no idea how much the world would change between 1968 and now.

From Tethers to Drones

In those years, our friends and brothers enlisted or were drafted to fight in Vietnam. Since then, we have sent more soldiers to fight endless wars, though today, drones and robots often replace human “cannon fodder.” Technology runs the world now. Thanks to the Internet, the world is smaller, and our phones are no longer tethered to a wall outlet. Sadly, social media has often replaced conversation.

Television news has evolved from a brief 10-minute evening broadcast into a 24-hour buffet of local, regional, and national coverage. YouTube has made me a morning news junkie, but lately, the focus is so narrow and repetitive that I’ve begun to experience “gaslighting exhaustion.”

The “Miriam” Webster Definition

My friend Miriam Webster defines gaslighting as:

Psychological manipulation... that causes the victim to question the validity of their own thoughts, perception of reality, or memories.

Psychology Today suggests resisting this by recalling one’s own successes. Fortunately, my trip to the ocean included a book signing at The Greyhound in Berlin, Maryland. I am a published author in the last quarter of my life, and I spent a wonderful day signing Ona’s Tears and talking about historical fiction. Last Friday, a Counselor for the Lithuanian Embassy in DC bought a copy of my book and thanked me for writing it. Very few people have written novels about Lithuanian history; it was a moment of profound “light.”

See the Light

According to Miriam, there are 16 definitions for the word “light.” While I experienced “dawn” (No. 2) this morning, these three are particularly relevant for those of us feeling gaslighted:

• 6. Spiritual illumination; truth.

• 7. Public knowledge.

• 8. Something that enlightens or informs.

Watching the sunrise reminds us that no matter what humans do, the sun will continue to rise for at least another five billion years.

The Endurance of the “Lost Generation”

Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises reflects the disillusionment of the “Lost Generation” after WWI—a world where traditional meaning failed to provide fulfillment. Yet, his later work, The Old Man and the Sea, offers a different perspective. It is a story of endurance that left an indelible impression on me during college.

Finding the Balance

To endure the modern world, I’ve had to find my own balance:

• Digital Detox: I’ve exchanged the stress of the news for jigsaw puzzles on Jigidi while watching Netflix before bed.

• Self-Care: Acupuncture, chiropractic and massage help me manage my fibromyalgia.

• Connection: Weekly dates at the Silent Book Club and Lithuanian Hall keep me social.

• Family: Yearly trips keep me tethered to my long-distance friends and kin.

What keeps you balanced when the world feels like a quagmire? Let me know in the comments.

While US news holds our myopic attention like obedient goldfish, there is other news we should be thinking about.

1.Putin’s Stuck in a Nightmare Scenario

Putin can’t back out of the war he started because his “personal survival” is at stake. Like The Little Engine That Could, Ukraine is proving how the “smarter, not harder” principle works. Through rapid innovation in drone technology, Ukraine has brought Russian soldiers to their knees, literally. Once a Russian Soldier hears the whir of a drone they know the only option is to surrender. When Putin started the war he threw cannon fodder at the Ukrainians. The cost of employing one soldier can not compare to the cost of a drone. Russia is running out of human resources. I have nothing against the Russian people nor any people ruled by despots.

“A despot is a ruler or leader holding absolute power, typically exercising it in a cruel, oppressive, or tyrannical manner... Synonyms include tyrant, autocrat, dictator, oppressor, and potentate.” — Merriam-Webster

The Russian people seem unable to recover from the collapse of the USSR, lost in a dream of living a free life. Meanwhile, the Baltic countries—who led the resistance that toppled the Soviet Union—have reestablished their independence, joining NATO and the EU. In June 2024, Vilnius, Lithuania was named one of the happiest cities in the world for people under 30. I was there in August, 2025 and could see why.

2. Victor Orban’s Nightmare

While I am not well-versed in all of Hungarian history, I am watching how the country is beginning to shift away from its despot toward Péter Magyar and the Tisza Party.

The Respect and Freedom Party (TISZA) is a centre to centre-right, pro-European, and populist movement. In recent elections, turnout reached nearly 80%—the highest in post-communist Hungarian history. Young people turned out in droves.

• The Shift: “This is the end of an era,” some say of the shifting power.

• The Reaction: “We must bear this defeat with dignity.”

3. The Pig in the Python is on the way out

The top of the Baby Boomers’ generation turns 80 this year. We are busy contemplating death with dignity, bucket lists to complete, keeping our brains from rotting. My calendar is a minefield of doctor’s visits and self-care appointments; I even triple-booked myself recently.

We are blamed for ruining this country born of the greatest generation. Gripe, gripe gripe….. I don’t have time for that.

Americans under 30 are often cited as the most “miserable” age group due to social media and economic anxiety. After reading the New York Times article I shared last week I have hope. I believe in the 90/10 theory: 10% of the “rotten kids” get 90% of our attention, which means 90% of them are doing just fine. We are making way for them to turn this world around.

4. 10 Things We Can All Do to Protect “d”emocracy

The Primaries are on! Arkansas was first and the results are in. What exactly is at stake? That is a rhetorical question and one I am not going to ask out loud because it will only cause noise. Instead you can read what Democracy Docket proposes.

Note: If you are a fan of our current president, I suggest you skip the link. I am sticking to my self-imposed rule of not offending my readers.

5. Walking Away with Dignity

My core values aren’t negotiable; they are the moral compass I live by. In 1980, a class required us to write our life goal in one sentence. Mine has guided every decision I’ve made, personally and professionally:

My goal is to help people get where they want to go. I am a flawed human being and I have failed at times, but I always take responsibility. Last week, I felt rewarded by my readers. Then, on Saturday, my mood plummeted due to a single email. It was a gut punch. I went through the stages of grief, called my best friend, and hugged my foster dog.

I crawled out of that rabbit hole realizing I was experiencing the “shoot the messenger” effect. It is a tested psychological phenomenon. Look it up—but don’t blame me if you can’t get out of the hole!

Up for a discussion?

Let me know if your hope has been renewed this week. Have you experienced the “shoot the messenger” effect? My response to the one who pulled the trigger is: if you don’t like the answer, don’t ask the question.

Raising Discerning Adults

I learned about decisions and consequences in graduate school. Human Resources courses in the MBA program provided a plethora of evolving theories on how to manage employees. I won’t drag you through the list from the 1970s to the start of the 21st century; they all boil down to the fact that decisions result in consequences. Employing a “loose/tight” relationship with subordinates allows people to learn by doing while keeping guardrails in place to minimize disasters. It’s also an excellent way to raise responsible children.

Since both my children were born in April, I have been thinking about how they and other adult children have turned out. It makes me wish for more adults my age to have learned that poor decisions can result in disastrous outcomes with global consequences. (Names need not be mentioned.) We are the ones who must now make our decisions based on the consequences caused by others.

Help from AI

My Substack Village has provided thoughtful responses to the nightmare we can’t seem to wake up from. Rather than repeat or echo their work, I turned to AI and asked, “How do we deal with consequences of world leaders’ actions?” Gemini provided an apolitical response that helps us navigate the fallout without getting lost in the noise:

• Shape the Narrative: Use public communication to steer discussions toward constructive outcomes early.

• Manage Political Stress: Constant consumption of political content fuels anxiety. Set boundaries, prioritize self-care, and find productive outlets for activism rather than passive consumption.

• Foster Dialogue: Engage in nonpartisan community dialogue to combat the intense polarization that often follows bad leadership decisions.

Psychological and Social Management from the Pulpit

In addition to my MBA, I earned a Certificate in Advanced Counseling Services from the University of NH. Back in the day, it was the first two years of a PhD in Psychology. Before moving back to Baltimore, I had a private practice in Psychotherapy.

I have the good fortune of attending a church where our Pastor is a PhD and Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor. His talk today reminded me of my final paper for Psychological Stress and Adaptation.

Back in my undergraduate Biology Major days, I learned cell theory, and I’ve often used it as a model for the human spirit. The cell has a semi-permeable membrane:

1. It closes in toxic environments for protection.

2. It must open in safe environments to let toxins out and nutrients in.

If the cell remains closed indefinitely, it will poison itself and die.

The sermon today offered three points: Spread joy, have a purpose, and stay open. The purpose I share with my Substack Villagers is to create a space for reflection. We participate in each other’s comments, staying open to views and spreading joy.

Three April Rabbit Holes

Curated links for your entertainment.

Going Down the Rabbit Hole

• Renewal Amidst Turmoil — Jeanette Lewis reflects on finding peace when the world feels like a scary place.

• The Constant of Growth — A reminder that Spring is nature’s way of proving that fresh starts are always possible.

• What Gives Teenagers Hope in 2026 — You must click on this one. While many see a “country of cynics,” the overwhelming majority of our youth refuse to despair. From “The Great Meme Reset” to a renewed focus on community care, these kids have some great parenting behind them!

I would love to read your comments and insights.

A Mother’s Worry

TSA lines and volatile weather launched the “airport nightmares” of Spring Break 2026. Since both of my children had travel plans, I was especially tuned in to the news. Ultimately, my daughter canceled her trip, and my son flew back from Japan on April 2nd, where the domestic TSA and Spring Break chaos weren’t an issue.

How is Spring Break Determined?

In the United States, Spring Break for universities and K–12 systems depends on term dates and where the Easter holiday falls on the calendar.

During my thirty years in academia, the “separation of church and state” was always a touchy subject during the week the college closed after the Fall semester. Our time off was technically a collection of saved holidays: New Year’s Day, President’s Day, Columbus Day, Veteran’s Day, and Christmas Day.

Today, Christmas and Easter have shifted from primarily religious observances to broader cultural and commercial festivals. This evolution involves the absorption of pagan traditions and a move toward secular celebration.

A Rabbit as an Easter Agent

The association of bunnies with spring comes from their reproductive abundance, making them a symbol of fertility long before “Easter” existed. Rabbits have deep roots in pagan spring festivals and were often given as offerings around the spring equinox.

The first connections between the religious holiday and the bunny can be traced to 8th-century Britain, when early Christians merged customs with the celebrations of the goddess Eostre (from whom Easter receives its name). Thanks to the candy industry, some traditions have adopted the name “Resurrection Sunday.” It makes one wonder: is Christmas up for a name change next?

Easter Eggs

Ancient Romans used vegetable dyes to color eggs, giving them away to symbolize new beginnings. Early Christians viewed eggs as symbols of fertility and abundance; they would refrain from eating them during Lent, preserving and dyeing them instead to be eaten first on Easter Sunday as a symbol of resurrection.

Family Tradition

When my grandparents moved to Baltimore, they lived in a Lithuanian community that practiced “picking an egg.” It is a perfect example of combining pagan and Christian traditions.

Before Easter dinner, we would each select a dyed egg (usually from a PAAS kit). We picked the one we thought was strongest, often testing them by tapping them against our front teeth. My dad loved telling stories of the neighborhood kids playing this game. You would hold the egg protected in your fist, and everyone would take turns cracking them—point to point, then “butt to butt.”

The one whose egg didn’t crack won the opponent’s egg. The boys made it interesting: a loser might swap their cracked egg for a dyed raw egg and slip it into the winner’s back pocket to be slapped later. But heaven help the boy who cheated by sucking the raw egg out, filling the shell with sugar, and letting it sit by the furnace until it turned into a rock-hard weapon.

Easter Baskets

The first Easter baskets were filled with foods forbidden during Lent, brought to church on Holy Saturday to be blessed. Because candy was off-limits during the fast, baskets eventually became laden with sweets.

If you’ve ever had a Mary Sue Easter Egg, you’ve tasted a Baltimore staple. Founded by the Spector and Ashton families in 1948, Mr. Ashton named the company after his daughters, Mary and Sue. Both eventually became nuns. It must have been hell not being able to eat that chocolate!

Dropping “Easter Eggs”

Now that my first book is published, readers of Ona’s Tears might remember the “easter eggs” I dropped throughout the story. I’m currently working on the sequel and applying those same subtle nods—a trick I learned from authors who specialize in world-building.

Running Against the Wind: A Reflection

Holidays are their own kind of rabbit hole; they remind us of those no longer with us. The petals from spring trees—the cherry blossom, flowering pears and magnolias—are short-lived. Driving through a tree-lined street during a “petal storm” is unforgettable.

After my mother passed, I had the good fortune to “adopt” two mothers also born in 1918. One lived to 80, the other to 102. Both were vision-impaired, yet they were in absolute awe of the petal storms we drove through.

On my drive home from Easter service, a female cardinal nearly flew into my car. She caught the wind just in time, veering away from my left headlight. Many believe cardinals are symbols of the deceased visiting us. At that exact moment, Running Against the Wind was playing on the radio.

The song is a mid-tempo ballad about aging and pushing through life’s challenges. Bob Seger once said:

“I always say it’s human nature that people are gonna love you sometimes and they’re gonna use you sometimes. Knowing the difference... that’s what ‘Against the Wind’ is all about.”

“I’ve got so much more to think about
Deadlines and commitments
What to leave in, what to leave out”

What do those lyrics mean to you as you run against the wind?

That mother cardinal got my attention. Perhaps she got yours, too.